In the hopes of avoiding adding more stretch marks to my already huge collection this pregnancy, I’ve been super diligent in my anti-stretch mark “campaign”. My slathery weapons of choice (and routine) follows:
Every morning and after every shower:
1st layer: Palmer’s Stretch Mark Cream
2nd layer: Whatever body lotion I’m using
Before bed in the evening:
Mama Bee Belly Butter by Burt’s Bee’s
When I feel itchy during the day:
I avoid itching by gently “patting” or rubbing straight up Vitamin E Oil onto the area
Pretty normal kind of rotation, right? However, when I was lubing up this morning, I noticed some peculiar splotches on my tummy. Upon closer inspection, I found they were new stretch marks.
(Crying a little inside)
You would think with all the money I’m shelling out on anti-stretch mark products, they’d at least work a teensy weensy bit. Nope. In which case, why continue to hack away at this lost cause? Well, a girl’s gotta dream, people.
After my bitterly disappointing morning, I sought to console myself with a little research. And because I’m suffering from pregnancy super feels right now, I’ll share what I found with you, because I want you to care as much as I do. Even if you don’t. Lie to me.
Prepare yourself for more words than you’ve ever seen in this blog…
According to Wikipedia:
- Between 75% and 90% of women develop stretch marks to some degree during pregnancy
- A German research team tested the application of massage and cream and found that only one-third of women with this treatment developed stretch marks, while two-thirds of an untreated control group developed stretch marks
- Another randomized study tested cocoa butter. The result was that 44% of the women using cocoa butter had stretch marks after pregnancy, while 55% using a placebo did, but this was not found to be a statistically significant difference
(Did you reach your max capacity on stretch mark info yet? Too bad, there’s more!)
This is what the Stretch Mark Institute (who knew there was one?) said about it:
It boils down to this: If I want to continue to use a product that says it’ll help me avoid getting stretch marks, I should go right on ahead. There’s a good chance it might work… or not.
Now, please excuse me as I go get over myself. And my apologies for unleashing ALL the hormones on the internet today. Carry on.